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Nominator: ProtoDrake (talk · contribs) 19:20, 30 March 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: A412 (talk · contribs) 21:40, 31 March 2024 (UTC) I'll take a look at this. ~ A412 talk! 21:40, 31 March 2024 (UTC)
As of this revision.
official sequel, because the source saying that it does
look more and more like Nier: Reincarnation has quietly been the sequelseems to mean that it isn't "officially" a sequel.
In battles, your characters will automatically attack, which seems to contradict the article saying there's a manual option.
Persona 5 Royal?
third arc's sixth and closing chapter.
The game is part of the Nier universe- I think it's either
part of the Nier seriesor
set in the Nier universe. I would also delink universe per MOS:SOB.
gachalinks to loot box and not gacha game.
and contributed to the scenario- What does
the scenariomean here?
The title is set to end service worldwide on April 29, 2024- This feels like an odd thing to be the only summary of the release section in the lead. I would also mention when it was released, that content was released chapter-by-chapter, and maybe that the international release came later.
Journalists gave mixed to positive reviews; praise was given to its writing, art design and music, while the gacha system was often criticized.- Weird mixed tense. I would be consistent and say
Journalists gave mixed to positive reviews; praising its writing, art design and music, while often criticizing the gacha system.
The player navigates different areas of the Cage in the company of ghost-like companionsleaves me wondering if there is a player character that the player plays as, or if they play as the companions in the stories.
The gameplay is split into three types-
typesseems like the wrong word. Is
modesmore correct? Also, it's unclear to me which things are the three.
During this exploration, they come across Scarecrows which grant and upgrade weapons used to fight enemies within unlocked memories- This seems to contradict the first paragraph? How do the scarecrows relate to the memories?
In these memories, dubbed Weapon Stories, players experience the memories of those related to a weapon from a side-scrolling painting-like perspective, entering battles to correct errors in the memories- Is this more concise as
In these memories, dubbed Weapon Stories, players experience the memories of a weapon from a side-scrolling painting-like perspective, and enter battles to correct errors.?
Battles play out automatically in real-time inside the memories with a party of three characters against enemies.- Can probably remove
inside the memories, the previous sentence makes that clear.
At launch, Nier Reincarnation included- This makes it sound like the minigame was later removed. If not,
Nier Reincarnation launched with.
The goal is to avoid obstacles and find coins within the time limit, with items granting buffs and enemies which will decrease the player score if Mama is hit- Maybe
The goal is to collect coins and items that grant buffs within a time limit, while avoiding obstacles and enemies which decrease the player's score?
fight an opposing party created by another player-
fight parties created by other players?
While the storyline characters are present in-game from the outset- I think
unlockedis clearer than
are present in-game.
"Force"the first time.
with a similar being called "Mama" guiding him to gain the power needed to reverse the body swap- Who is the
himbeing guided?
perform the swap and confirm their friendship- saying they
reverse the swapis probably clearer
each recovering fragments of the broken sun and moon- does
eachrefer to the siblings or the ghosts?
Their story reveals them to be siblings separated by their parents' divorce following a turbulent marriage, ultimately showing that each sibling kill the other's parent out of hatred; their wishes to revive their parents come into conflict- There's a lot in this sentence, maybe break it before
ultimately
The default ending has one sibling killing the other- Are the roles of the siblings fixed, or does the player choose one?
humanity's extinctionto Nier is a bit surprising, I'd suggest
humanity's extinction in the events of Nier, similar for the link to Nier Automata
two merged artificial beings overwhelmed with loneliness;- I think you want a colon instead of a semicolon
receiving aid from the player- Unclear either what this means (hasn't the whole game had the player?), or why it links to fourth wall
As time restarts, reviving friendly Machines and androids, Fio joins Her in the real world to keep her company, with Levania promising to watch over her from the Cage- is
Machinesa name here, and are
Herand
herdifferent?
@A412: I've hopefully sorted out everything above. The plot was a little tricky at times, as it's pretty...complicated. --ProtoDrake (talk) 19:51, 8 April 2024 (UTC)
Nier Reincarnation was developed by Applibot- It might be helpful to include a few words about what Applibot is, as we don't have an article on it.
While the game is within->
While the game is set within
by newcomers- Newcomers to the game, or newcomers to the series? Probably best to be specific.
The short story structure was built around short stories- Maybe
The narrative structure was built around short stories?
also meaning it could end prematurely- Does
itrefer to Reincarnation or SINoALICE here?
The second arc was written by Yuki Wada based on a draft by Yoko. During early stages, the two leads' middle school days were going to be shown- I would combine these so it's clear the sentence is about the second arc.
The second arc was written by Yuki Wada based on a draft by Yoko, and during its early stages, the two leads' middle school days were going to be shown
Matsukawa originally wanted static picture book presentation->
Matsukawa originally wanted a static picture book presentation
The in-game movie productionrefer to?
The gameplay was designed to resemble automatic mode in Nier Automata- FYI: I don't have a specific change in mind, but I quickly read the Automata gameplay section and it doesn't mention "automatic mode".
were included->
was included
During its later development, the team tweaked the game's design and functions to improve playability and accessibility.- This sentence kinda doesn't say anything. If the source isn't more specific, I'd consider dropping it.
Unity game engineis a MOS:SOB, I'd delink game engine.
weapon story sequences->
Weapon Storiesto be consistent
Weapon story->
Weapon Storyto be consistent
to create a 2D illusion-
to create a 2D appearanceor
to resemble 2Dare probably clearer
Due to being a mobile game, the music- bit of a grammar issue here, the music isn't a mobile game, I'd suggest
Due to being composed for a mobile game, the musicor
Due to Reincarnation being a mobile game, the music
game's "nostalgic" atmosphere, gaining an atmosphere compared to fairy tales- awkward phrasing.
game's "nostalgic" atmosphere, which the composers compared to fairy tales?
While originally planned for a 2020 release, Square Enix delayed its Japanese debut into the first half of 2021- same subject agreement grammar issue. Maybe
Originally planned for 2020, its release was delayed by Square Enix into the first half of 2021
Following the beta period, full voice acting for the story sections was still an unknown, but fan feedback persuaded the team to include full voice acting despite the technical difficulties- This feels like it should be in Development
The game's UI was designed around that from the start, with a translation challenge being fitting English versions of the dialogue into the text boxesprobably reads smoother if you move
translationfor
The game's UI was designed around that translation from the start, with a challenge being fitting English versions of the dialogue into the text boxes
international version- Can we choose
Westernor
international?
Matsukawa stated the international version, while essentially identical to the Japanese release, would include exclusive collaborations such as a variant of recurring Nier Automata character 2B, and balance adjustments to the gacha system- Should this sentence be split, with
Matsukawa stated the international version would be essentially identical to the Japanese release, with balance adjustments to the gacha systemin the second paragraph, and just the exclusive collaborations in this one?
is under consideration- could use an
as of
is planned- could use an
as of
would no longer feature an English language dub- We use
voice the game in Englishabove. I assume this is referring to the same thing?
there are no plans- Probably
there were no plans
applications- While this word isn't incorrect, because we also use
appto describe the game, it's a bit confusing.
English release- Again, we should probably choose one of
Western,
international, or
English.
Reviewers praised the game's narrative
the flavor text given the weapons which expanded upon the narrative-
the expansion of the narrative from the weapons' flavor text? Also, from reading the translated source, I'm pretty sure that by "flavor text", this review also just means Weapon Stories.
both the main narrative and its side content->
both the main narrative and side content
its themes of loss- Loss seems to be a singular theme?
gacha system was not a required mechanic to experience the story-
was not required to experience the story?
Henge found playing the game to be a slog due to its shallow combat system- Bit of a MOS:SAID issue here. We don't want to describe the game as shallow in Wikivoice.
and its high energy demand on phone batteries to run->
high battery usageor
high power requirements?
and enjoyed the combat despite a lack of innovative elements- same MOS:SAID issue
@ProtoDrake: Done now. Sorry for the holdup, got offwiki-busy after accepting this last week. Feel free to push back on any suggestions you don't think improve the article, and ping me for another pass. ~ A412 talk! 02:12, 10 April 2024 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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