This certainly has the potential to be a GA, but there are quite a few issues that mean it will take some work. I'll detail my concerns below and put the review on hold to allow time for them to be addressed. Apologies if it seems like a long list, but it's doable. HJ Mitchell | Penny for your thoughts? 22:49, 5 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
general
Prose:
I gave the first paragraph a quick copy edit. You should go over the rest of the article or ask someone else to and check the prose
You need a lot more commas in there—the lack of them makes it quite difficult to read
Ranks and titles should only be capitalised when they're in front of a name
lot of hyphens (-) which should be endashes (–) or emdashes (—), see MOS:DASH
The article relies heavily on a primary source, namely his autobiography
References need proper formatting, not just bare URLs—they need titles, publications, publication dates (if known) and retrieval dates at the very least. There are various templates to help format them consistently and the London Gazette refs require the use of Template:London Gazette Done Thanks to Ohconfucius(talk)
lead
MOS:BIO is worth a read, if you haven't read it already
The article should open with his rank since that was his title Done
Only the name should be bolded (not post-noms like AFC) and you need a comma before the post-noms Done
Place of birth shouldn't be in the lead Done
Full name and dates of birth/death require citations Done As close as it can be with records available from freeMBD index
Cruiser and heavyweight boxing titles
In Scott's case the squad commander named Newbigging was a large fellow of some six foot four and had seen a lot of service with the Scots Guards in World War I. Newbigging soon took offence to Scott's precocious attitude, as Scott was undisciplined and fresh from the sugar plantations, where he was well adept at enforcing discipline, but not too keen on taking orders for himself. This clash of personalities lead to Scott and Newbigging having a bout of fisticuffs (as Scott referred to it), of which Scott was the victor. What happened to WP:NPOV?
I'll leave this for now to give a chance for the fixes to be made and check back in a few days.
Thanks HJ, I really appreciate your input on this, I will try and find the time asap to start addressing the points you have raised, I will need help with the prose tho because that really isn't my stong point, as you noticed!! I hope you dont ming if I put a done tick by each point when I or someone else has resolved it, a bit psycological but will help me get on top of sorting through the list thanks again for your help and if you know anyone who would be suited to helping to fix the grammer and any other probs I would be most gratefull! many thanks Jimmy3d0 (talk) 00:47, 6 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Hi Wizardman, I am still going to sort through the problems that I can fis myself but am so busy with work etc that I just haven't had any time to do anything for a couple of weeks, but I will when I get a chance, I would very much appreciate it though if some-one could go through the grammer issues though as thats not my strong point, but I dont really know who to ask or how to go about getting help, I will try to find some time to deal with the other issues asap, Cheers Jimmy3d0 (talk) 20:55, 20 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Prose needs a good copy-edit, the WP:Guild of Copyeditors may be able to help. Unnecessary captilisation and bolding, lack of commas leading to poor readability.
Over long section names
Lists, bulleted lists are deprecated.
Bibliography should be below references, with ELs below them.
Are articles on the individual aircraft registrations likely in the near future?
Red linking terms such as squad commander are unnecessary, also this twerm should not be in quotes.
Not all quotations are in quote marks. Block quotes may be suitable for longer quotes.
rather too much detail about the divorce, just make the statement with a citation, the full newspaper story is not needed. Likewise the full obituary - publication in full may be a copyright violation. The list of aircraft is unnecessary, perhaps a spin off list article.
10% samples of video or sound clips are permissible, but not the full 9.5 minutes, sevral images lack appropriate no free use rationales for use in this article.
Hello,
Sorry to butt-in, but it would appear to me that a sufficient amount of corrections have been made to reach the standards of a good article. There are many GAs that do not meet the quality of this article, and I believe another look may be useful. Thanks for listening, Wikipedian2 (talk) 19:33, 14 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]
That sounds good to me! I just haven't been able to find the time to do any more work on the artical recently, I wish I could because I really want to get it to GA status, but its good to hear your views on this and hear that you think it may already be at GA level. Cheers Jimmy3d0 (talk) 09:38, 15 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Couple of points. First, who chose Scott to fly a DH88? The article gives the impression that he was chosen by de Havilland, which I do not think was th case. And secondly, who was his third wife and when did he mary her?TheLongTone (talk) 06:20, 11 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]