The text of the entry was: Did you know ... that the music style of singer-songwriter Kui Lee featured a blend of traditional Hawaiian music, jazz, blues, and rock and roll?
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I thought it would be ideal to review this article since you currently have two music GANs pending, but this is my first time reviewing an artist's Wiki so feel free to inform me of any mistakes I make during the review! --K. Peake 07:47, 17 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
It is not written out anywhere in the body that his career started in 1955
Remove the comma after his stage name in the first sentence
"while performing as a dancer and singer." → "while performing as a dancer and later returned to Hawaii to become a singer." since that is the accurate representation
"Upon his return to Hawaii," → "Upon his return to the country," since once the above change is implemented, writing Hawaii so close would be repetitive
Second word of Honey club should not be capitalised
"released his debut album." → "released his debut studio album, The Extraordinary Kui Lee (1966)." – this will make it quite obvious he died in December 1966 too
"debut single, "Ain't No Big Thing", paired with "All I Want To Do" in May." → "debut single "Ain't No Big Thing", paired with "All I Want To Do", in May 1965." with the target
"his regret at not" → "his regret towards not"
[15] should be at the end of the two preceding sentences as well as after the comma
"a ceremony in July." → "a ceremony in July 1966."
"he began treatment" → "Lee began receiving treatment" but this part is not backed up
Remove wikilink on Sweden
"In August, local artists" → "In August 1966, local artists"
"It starred Kimo Kahoano as Lee, and Shaunne Gallipeau as his wife." → "The play starred Kimo Kahoano as Kui, and Shaunne Gallipeau as Nani Lee." per MOS:SAMESURNAME
"given posthumously to Lee." → "given posthumously to Kui Lee."
"Presented by Don Ho," → "Presented by Ho,"
Discography
Chart positions table is not needed at all since none of the releases charted
On hold until everything is fixed; one of the issues I noticed throughout was original research, but it is not too much to be fixed in a week or less! --K. Peake 12:26, 17 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
@Kyle Peake: As an opening comment, I want to thank you for taking up the review. Secondly, I want to remark how thoroughly you reviewed the sources (I recognize that I can be a little sloppy when citing). Thanks for that too. Now, without further do, let's go to the details:
Infobox and lead: As for the start of his career, I didn't even realize 1955 was there. I can either say when he started to perform as a knife dancer. As an alternative, we could use 1961, as it was the year he started singing. For the moment, I decided to just erase it from the infobox.
Early life: I found a small news piece that has his father explaining how the end up going back to Hawaii. By the war, I suppose he may have referred to the conflict surrounding the U.S. gunboat diplomacy in China, and the escalating tensions (and not World War II)? There was a book source also pointing out to them returning after the death of his mother, but it did not specify anything about a war (though I am not able to locate it now, exactly what I meant before about sloppiness when it comes to citing).
Legacy: I included now the source discussing that blend, and how he was influenced by the music that was popular at the time in the mainland. (1)
References: I use "xx Staff (number)" when it is the same publication, it does not list a specific author and was published the same year. I did not figure out yet what to write on the sfn template that would point straight to the reference I want to without having a conflict with another reference published the same year, by the same author.
I want to thank you again for taking up the nomination. Kui Lee is not exactly a well-known artist, and I was not expecting to get a reviewer soon.--GDuwenHoller! 20:11, 17 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
GDuwen Good to see you have got round to working on this article after my review so quickly; I will address the points in the following text. You should use 1961 I recommend, as that is the year that it is most appropriate to classify his career as having started in. It is fortunate that you have been able to find a source for backing up his father's return to Hawaii, plus the diplomacy in China is probably the war in question that led to them moving so I would highly suggest mentioning that. As for the blend, that part was very interesting to read so kudos for finding a source to back it up! Regarding your last comment about changes to the sections, just check the order of the sources then change the sfn for the ones where there is a number 2 appropriately. I felt glad to have reviewed this, not only because it was my first time taking on an artist's article but the article had been pending since September! --K. Peake 20:58, 17 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
@Kyle Peake: Well, I added the information about the conflict. I linked it to a subsection of another article that covers nicely the threat at the time (Yangtze Patrol#1930–1942). It was a complicated time to describe, as the conflict was first with the Nationalist. Then they flipped to be allies against the Japanese. Anyway I also reverted the numbers, so I suppose that's all.--GDuwenHoller! 21:41, 17 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
GDuwen The article looks much better with that info, even though I did some brief copy editing after the addition of it and I also fixed the staff number for Billboard since that is the only one you missed. ✓Pass now, very pleased with your quick response! --K. Peake 21:49, 17 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by SL93 (talk) 05:38, 28 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Improved to Good Article status by GDuwen (talk). Self-nominated at 19:34, 18 January 2021 (UTC).[reply]
Verified that the article is long enough, that there are no plagiarism concerns through the Copyvios tool and spotchecking, and that the hook is sourced in the article. Cunard (talk) 09:53, 19 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]
The image, which is the derivative of an advertisement, is in the public domain under ((PD-US-no notice advertisement)). Cunard (talk) 09:53, 19 January 2021 (UTC)[reply]