GA Review[edit]

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Reviewer: HeartGlow30797 (talk · contribs) 05:37, 3 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

GA review
(see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):
    b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references):
    b (citations to reliable sources):
    c (OR):
    d (copyvio and plagiarism):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):
    b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
    b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

Overall:
Pass/Fail:

· · ·

Timeline

Notes from reviewer

The author devoted an entire chapter of the book to the Massacre, Chapter XLIII (43), pages 424-458. That seems prominent to me. Shearonink (talk) 07:53, 3 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
He also mentioned it on the book's title page, as seen here: https://books.google.com/books?id=XbcUAAAAYAAJ&printsec=frontcover&source=gbs_ge_summary_r&cad=0#v=onepage&q&f=false. Shearonink (talk) 16:28, 3 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
I just adjusted that sentence to hopefully be more clear. Shearonink (talk) 18:15, 7 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Cleaning it up? The usage is not incorrect. The overall event itself is singular though it consists of various individual sub-events and such usage occurs in over 5000 other Wikipedia articles, mostly in their lead sentences. Shearonink (talk) 07:53, 3 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
The actual number is unknown, so I removed it. Shearonink (talk) 07:53, 3 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
I adjusted that were to the singular was. There is an otherwise consistent referral to the party as being a singular unit elsewhere in the article ("the Baker–Fancher party was from Arkansas", "The Baker–Fancher party defended itself", etc.) Shearonink (talk) 07:53, 3 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
It's not incorrect usage. It is not significant other than that was the distance the party had traveled, the distance from Salt Lake City to where Kanosh Utah now is. Shearonink (talk) 07:53, 3 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
No, the Old Spanish Trail was over 700 miles long and connected New Mexico with Los Angeles. It was a hellacious trade route and very difficult. Shearonink (talk) 07:53, 3 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
The quote at that ref makes it clear - "If you were to inquire of the people who lived hereabouts, and lived in the country at that time, you would find, ... that some of this Arkansas company ...boasted of having to helped to kill Hyrum and Joseph Smith and the Mormons in Missouri, and that they never meant to leave the Territory until similar scenes were enacted here." but I did adjust it to make it crystal-clear. Shearonink (talk) 07:53, 3 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
I don't understand what this comment means re 1b... "the word 'said' could be replaced". If the statements are referring to quoted statements or witnesses statements of events, either in newspaper articles or in official US Gov/Army reports or in court hearings...the word 'said' is correct. If it is a matter of stylistic preference that some other word perhaps should be used instead of 'said' that preference would not seem to be part of the GA criteria. Keeping in mind WTW, these statements are not words that introduce bias like puffery or unsupported attributions or editorializing, they are all part of the historical record. The word 'said' is used 3 times in the main text, once in a caption, and 4 times in references & notes. That usage does not seem boringly repetitious in an article with prose size of 4693 words and references in text of 18 kB. I'm willing to discuss and change if need be but I am somewhat puzzled over this possible "1b" issue... Shearonink (talk) 04:42, 13 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
I think I see what you meant, take a look at my latest edit here. Lee & others said Higbee gave the order, Higbee almost claims later that he was barely there...presented the information according to sources, etc. Shearonink (talk) 06:12, 13 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Yes, it is all well! It’s not a big deal or anything, just some fine touches. Heart (talk) 04:54, 18 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Perhaps, but to me this seems beyond the reach of the Good article criteria. Word choices, phrase choices are just that, editors' choices and are within editorial discretion. Shearonink (talk) 20:09, 27 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
It was a typo. Fixed. Shearonink (talk) 20:09, 27 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Adjusted. Shearonink (talk) 20:09, 27 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
A lot of different people have edited this article over the years, not sure I personally worded it that way but it's been adjusted. Shearonink (talk) 20:09, 27 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
In this case the person in question is a former justice...I adjusted the word order per Wikipedia:Manual of Style#Titles of people. Shearonink (talk) 20:09, 27 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Yes the dash is needed. "Re-use" is not incorrect. Both forms, either re-use or reuse, are acceptable but to my eyes, if there is no dash meaning would be unclear and seems like it could be pronounced "royce". Shearonink (talk) 20:09, 27 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

Thanks for taking this on. FYI I will be taking the weekend off of WP but will return early nest week to catch up on your further comments in this review. Shearonink (talk) 08:04, 3 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
HeartGlow30797 - Looking forward to more Notes and working together to improve this article to GA status. Shearonink (talk) 15:44, 7 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
HeartGlow30797 - I dealt with all the "page numbers needed"-maintenance templates so those are all fixed and they were removed. Shearonink (talk) 18:18, 7 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]