The following is an archived discussion of a featured list nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The list was promoted by Giants2008 via FACBot (talk) 00:25, 11 May 2020 (UTC) [1].[reply]

List of Puella Magi Madoka Magica episodes[edit]

List of Puella Magi Madoka Magica episodes (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

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Nominator(s): I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 20:12, 23 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

In Summer 2018, Deidaramonroe nominated List of Puella Magi Madoka Magica episodes for FLC status. It failed. However, I, self-named I'm Aya Syameimaru!, was influenced by Deidaramonroe's actions to take this back here. I responded to TompaDompa's comments in the 2018 review and fulfilled it well. Now I nominated this FLC status, so this should succeed. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 20:12, 23 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Resolved comments from ChrisTheDude (talk) 12:05, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
;Comments
  • "It follows the story of Japanese 14-year-old middle school student" - "It follows the story of 14-year-old Japanese middle school student" reads better, I think
Done. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:08, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Source for the whole of that first paragraph?
Done, I completed it. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 11:06, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Since then, more commercials have been shown in the same slot revealing the characters and cast" => "Subsequently, more commercials were shown in the same slot revealing the characters and cast"
I fulfilled it. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:10, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "the broadcast of episodes 11 and 12 were delayed" => "the broadcasts of episodes 11 and 12 were delayed"
Got it. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:10, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ep 4 - "Out in the city Madoka notices several people, including her classmate Hitomi Shizuki, infected by the witch's kiss" - "Out in the city Madoka notices several people infected by the witch's kiss, including her classmate Hitomi Shizuki, " reads better I think
Done, did as you suggested. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:31, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Same ep - Elsewhere, Kyubey greets a recently arrived" => "Elsewhere, Kyubey greets a recently-arrived"
Done, did as you suggested. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:31, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ep 6 - "insists that she gives up on Sayaka" => "insists that she give up on Sayaka"
Done, did as you suggested. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:31, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Same ep - "Homura whom she blames for Mami's death" - add a comma after Homura
Done, did as you suggested. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:31, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ep 8 - "is an appropriate term to "witch"" - I would say "equivalent term"
Finished the suggestion. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:33, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ep 11 - "Homura's constant trips through time to try and save Madoka has" => "Homura's constant trips through time to try and save Madoka have"
Finished the suggestion. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:33, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Refs 8 and 20-25 have no work/publisher listed and I don't think "archived copy" is actually the title of the source
Just simply done. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 10:56, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I finished it all quickly. I'm Aya Syameimaru! I 文々。新聞 11:07, 29 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I'm very pleased with how well this is going so far. «“I'm Aya Syameimaru!”I„文々。新聞“I„userbako”» 01:00, 3 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Resolved comments from TompaDompa (talk) 23:25, 29 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Comments:
  • The table should not be sortable.
  • In the first table, all the air dates have a reference except the first one.
  • help each of them decide if there was a wish they would risk their lives for – this phrasing is a bit awkward.
    • Replaced "help each of them decide" with "determine". «I'm Aya Syameimaru!I文々。新聞Iuserbako» 16:47, 25 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
      • I'd rephrase a bit more, though I'm not quite sure how. Perhaps by replacing "if there was a wish" with "whether there is a wish". Or perhaps "any wish". Or maybe even "if they would risk their lives for a wish". TompaDompa (talk) 19:24, 28 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • while Madoka finds Mami – "goes to find" is better than "finds" in this context (assuming I've understood the events correctly).
  • As they continue Madoka mentions her wish is to simply be a magical girl and help others. – two things: Firstly, I'd add a comma after "continue". Secondly, I'd either add "that" after "mentions" or replace "is" with a colon, and I think the former would be better.
  • Mami laments that her job as a magical girl has left her lonely and afraid but feels happy that Madoka wishes to fight alongside her. – the sentence switches from the negative to the positive aspects very abruptly. I'd either add something along the lines of "on the other hand" or "also" after "but", or simply add a comma before "but".
  • notices several people [...] prepare to kill themselves – "prepare" should be "preparing".
  • infected by the witch's kiss – this the same witch as in the previous episode (Charlotte)? If it is, then that should be made explicit. If not, the definite article should be replaced with the indefinite one.
  • Later that day Madoka joins Sayaka on patrol, where they find a witch's familiar, but it escapes when Sayaka's attacks are blocked by Kyōko, who only cares about collecting Grief Seeds from mature witches. – This sentence has three commas. Either rephrase it to reduce the number of commas or split the sentence into multiple shorter ones.
  • Kyubey mentions to Sayaka about the potential Madoka has to become a magical girl – either change "mentions" to "talks", or remove "about" and move "to Sayaka" to the end.
  • mentioning that something known as Walpurgisnacht is approaching in two weeks to which Kyōko agrees to form an alliance with her to fight against it – I'd replace "to which" with a semicolon.
  • Sayaka gets angry at Kyubey for keeping the truth from her – this should be clarified.
  • he keeps her in check by making her feel the pain she would have felt otherwise while fighting Kyōko – this should be rephrased for clarity.
  • Madoka asks Homura about the meaning behind Kyubey's actions and why she never told them – this should be clarified.
  • Elsewhere, Kyubey muses that as a "woman" who has yet to mature is called a "girl", it follows that "magical girl" (魔法少女) is an equalivalent term to "witch" (魔女). – putting aside the typo, I don't think equivalence is the right way to describe this. Perhaps "magical girl" (魔法少女) is the corresponding term for a "witch" (魔女) who has yet to mature. would be better.
  • Incubators are coldly logical, with emotion considered an illness, so Madoka can understand the process. – huh?
  • The episode looks at an alternate timeline – I'd say "This episode [...]".
  • In the second table, "No." should be No. (i.e. ((abbr|No.|Number))).
  • I'd add a short paragraph above the home video release tables.
  • The references in the home video release tables are poorly placed. Either make a new column solely for the references (and name it Ref(s) – i.e. ((abbr|Ref(s)|Reference(s)))) or try WP:BUNDLING the citations and add them in the table captions.
  • The home video release tables have some abbreviations that should either be spelled out or use the ((abbr)) template.

TompaDompa (talk) 12:44, 25 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I made a few copyedits myself, and all my comments have now been resolved. TompaDompa (talk) 23:25, 29 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

It's cool being with you. We both get nice jobs. «I'm Aya Syameimaru!I文々。新聞Iuserbako» 01:33, 30 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I think 3 support is a minimum requirement for this FLC to pass, I would keep this alive and wait for another person to support it anyways. «ias!I,,.Iuserbako⬜» 03:24, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Source review

Since this is listed as needing a source review I am going to perform that over the next day or so, part of my promise at My FLC nomination. Note, while I am part of the WikiCup I am not looking to claim points for the source review I'm going to do. MPJ-DK (talk) 21:38, 7 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Quick feedback:

  • madoka-magic.com
    • It's the official website for Puella Magi Madoka Magica, so it's a reliable source. «ias!|,,.|usbk» 02:51, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Anime Newtype Channel
    • It's an official website for the magazine Newtype, so it's a reliable source. «ias!|,,.|usbk» 06:51, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
First paragraph
Second paragraph
Third paragraph
Fourth paragraph
Fifth paragraph
Table
Drama CDs
Home Video release

That is the end of my source review for now, if changes and improvements are made I'll be happy to review, revisit and revise my comments. MPJ-DK (talk) 23:45, 7 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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