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Reviewer: RunningTiger123 (talk · contribs) 01:01, 12 August 2022 (UTC)
Hi LuK3, this article caught my interest and I've decided to give it a go. It'll take some time to get through everything, but I should be able to finish it over the weekend. RunningTiger123 (talk) 01:01, 12 August 2022 (UTC)
Quick checks:
— RunningTiger123 (talk) 01:16, 12 August 2022 (UTC)
"not participate in the destruction of The Tonight Show"– this quote is never used in the body, and is therefore unattributed.
on appearing on television– awkward repetition, maybe try
against appearing on television?
— RunningTiger123 (talk) 01:27, 12 August 2022 (UTC)
which began in 1993.– should be a comma at the end
can compete→
could compete
(for Leno's entire run)– this might be confusing, since it's not immediately clear if this means 2009 or 2014. I'd suggest rewording or just removing it.
1:30 am.,→
1:30 am,
— RunningTiger123 (talk) 01:44, 12 August 2022 (UTC)
late nightshould be
late-nightwhen used as an adjective (not a huge issue, just something to consider)
Chernin warned...and
Numerous executives...
will stay at NBC→
would stay at NBC
as host well after the extension– feels like it's missing a few words, maybe
as until well after the extension was signed?
signedinstead of
sign? Other wordings are fine, but the current one is wrong. RunningTiger123 (talk) 02:22, 14 August 2022 (UTC)
he likened his removal→
Leno likened his removal
"paradigm shift"– cited source never uses this quote, so shouldn't be a direct quote
— RunningTiger123 (talk) 01:06, 13 August 2022 (UTC)
While Zucker called O'Brien to reiterate that the generational change was expected– following source doesn't mention this
by over 2.6 million viewers– it was actually much higher according to the source
18.4 million viewers– does not match source
coveted 18–24 demographicshould be
18–34
local news viewership– clarify that it's on NBC affiliates, not all networks
he will return→
he would return
Conan sidekick→
O'Brien sidekick
Affiliate calls came at an alarming rate, and research analysis revealed...– sentence abruptly transitions from Leno to O'Brien; make the shift clearer
Affiliate began calling the network to inquire about the show's fate..., perhaps that is a less jarring. -- LuK3 (Talk) 14:22, 14 August 2022 (UTC)
Affiliatesshould be plural. RunningTiger123 (talk) 01:51, 17 August 2022 (UTC)
— RunningTiger123 (talk) 01:35, 13 August 2022 (UTC)
11:35pm→
11:35 pmfor consistency
lamented his anxiety– weird word choice
...to share his thoughts regarding the ratings. -- LuK3 (Talk) 14:36, 14 August 2022 (UTC)
including Los Angeles Times→
including the Los Angeles Times
reminiscent of the Obama "Hope" poster– that's a bit of a stretch, I'm going to need a pretty clear source for that
Leno retained an talent agent, a publicist, and entertainment lawyers– inappropriate synthesis again with the current sources
an talent agent→
a talent agent
"raced past the reviled likes..."– this direct quote doesn't quite match the source
"There's been three hosts..."– unsourced direct quote
The comedians who came out in defense...– probably should have a source or be cut, especially the latter half of the sentence
10:00pm→
10:00 pm
Conan's lead-in→
O'Brien's lead-in
despite O'Brien's success...– this part of the sentence isn't mentioned in the source, so it's inappropriate synthesis
— RunningTiger123 (talk) 03:55, 14 August 2022 (UTC)
Sorry for the delay, I'll try to get the rest of the review knocked out ASAP.
"betrayed"is a direct quote, so it needs a source.
above standard GE levels– not in source and can easily be removed
they have done→
[they] have done
held for much of the rest of his runif it was published in 2010
(talk) 00:41, 20 August 2022 (UTC)
— RunningTiger123 (talk) 02:15, 17 August 2022 (UTC)
Also Leno's larger staff...– sentence is not supported by source, remove
any effort to mention O'Brien's tenure was whitewashed from company history– overstatement, they simply removed episodes from the internet
— RunningTiger123 (talk) 02:27, 17 August 2022 (UTC)
the show averages→
the show averaged
US$4 million per episode– source says 2 million
in November 2011.
until he announced Jimmy Fallon...– weird wording; maybe use
until Jimmy Fallon became the next host of the franchise in February 2014?
Less than a month removed from hosting Tonight...– irrelevant paragraph, remove
in addition to appearing on→
and later appeared on(current wording implies appearances were on same date)
In 2017, mention was made of the host in NBC's 90th Anniversary Special– unsourced
— RunningTiger123 (talk) 03:02, 17 August 2022 (UTC)
Sorry for the lengthy review and the delay – overall, it's a really strong article. Once the above comments are resolved, I'll be happy to support promotion. RunningTiger123 (talk) 03:03, 17 August 2022 (UTC)