Check for WP:LEAD:
- Check for Correct Structure of Lead Section: Done
- Check for Citations (WP:LEADCITE): Done
- Check for Introductory text: Done
- Check for Provide an accessible overview (MOS:INTRO): Done
- Major Point 1: Early career "Pilcher spent his early career as an infantry officer, first seeing active service on colonial campaigns in Nigeria in the late 1890s followed by command of an infantry battalion and a mounted infantry column in the Second Boer War (1899–1902), on which he published a book of lessons learned in 1903. Following the war, he quickly rose to command brigades on home service followed by a division in Burma." (summarised well in the lead)
- Major Point 2: Personal life and writing "However, further promotion was checked by his having come into conflict with his commander-in-chief, who regarded him as unsuited for senior command in part because of his writings; Pilcher was a keen student of the German army and its operational methods, and an active theorist who published a number of controversial books advocating the adoption of new military techniques. In 1906 he (anonymously) published an invasion novel, The Writing On The Wall." & "He had married Kathleen Gonne, daughter of a cavalry officer, in 1889; the marriage was strained, partly through Pilcher's womanising and gambling habits, and partly through his dislike for Maud Gonne, Kathleen's sister and a prominent Irish nationalist. The couple divorced in 1911, having had four children; one would later become a High Court judge, while another died on the Western Front in 1915. Pilcher remarried, to his mistress, in 1913." (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body, should be compressed further.)
- Major Point 3: First World War "He was sacked due to a refusal to continue unsuccessful attacks during the Battle of the Somme, and following his enforced retirement published a number of military books," & "On the outbreak of the First World War he was on leave in England, and eventually obtained the command of 17th (Northern) Division, a New Army volunteer unit. He commanded it during its first year on the Western Front, though without great respect from either his superiors or his subordinates. The division supported the initial attacks at the Battle of the Somme in July 1916, where Pilcher again clashed with his superiors over his refusal to push on an attack without pausing for preparations, believing it would result in failure and heavy casualties. The division was relieved after ten days of fighting on 11 July, and Pilcher was immediately sacked and sent to command a reserve centre in England. From here, he wrote a series of books before retiring in 1919." (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body, points are repeated.)
- Major Point 4: Later life "He ran as a parliamentary candidate for the splinter right-wing National Party in the 1918 general election, and continued a loose involvement with right-wing politics which extended to membership in the early British Fascisti." & "as well as unsuccessfully standing as an anti-Coalition candidate in the 1918 general election." (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body, few points are repeated.)
- Check for Relative emphasis: Done
- Major Point 1: Early career "Pilcher spent his early career as an infantry officer, first seeing active service on colonial campaigns in Nigeria in the late 1890s followed by command of an infantry battalion and a mounted infantry column in the Second Boer War (1899–1902), on which he published a book of lessons learned in 1903. Following the war, he quickly rose to command brigades on home service followed by a division in Burma." (the lead gives due weight as is given in the body)
- Major Point 2: Personal life and writing "However, further promotion was checked by his having come into conflict with his commander-in-chief, who regarded him as unsuited for senior command in part because of his writings; Pilcher was a keen student of the German army and its operational methods, and an active theorist who published a number of controversial books advocating the adoption of new military techniques. In 1906 he (anonymously) published an invasion novel, The Writing On The Wall." & "He had married Kathleen Gonne, daughter of a cavalry officer, in 1889; the marriage was strained, partly through Pilcher's womanising and gambling habits, and partly through his dislike for Maud Gonne, Kathleen's sister and a prominent Irish nationalist. The couple divorced in 1911, having had four children; one would later become a High Court judge, while another died on the Western Front in 1915. Pilcher remarried, to his mistress, in 1913." (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body, should be compressed further.)
- Major Point 3: First World War "He was sacked due to a refusal to continue unsuccessful attacks during the Battle of the Somme, and following his enforced retirement published a number of military books," & "On the outbreak of the First World War he was on leave in England, and eventually obtained the command of 17th (Northern) Division, a New Army volunteer unit. He commanded it during its first year on the Western Front, though without great respect from either his superiors or his subordinates. The division supported the initial attacks at the Battle of the Somme in July 1916, where Pilcher again clashed with his superiors over his refusal to push on an attack without pausing for preparations, believing it would result in failure and heavy casualties. The division was relieved after ten days of fighting on 11 July, and Pilcher was immediately sacked and sent to command a reserve centre in England. From here, he wrote a series of books before retiring in 1919." (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body, few points are repeated.)
- Major Point 4: Later life "He ran as a parliamentary candidate for the splinter right-wing National Party in the 1918 general election, and continued a loose involvement with right-wing politics which extended to membership in the early British Fascisti." & "as well as unsuccessfully standing as an anti-Coalition candidate in the 1918 general election." (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body, few points are repeated.)
- Check for Opening paragraph (MOS:BEGIN): Done
- Check for First sentence (WP:LEADSENTENCE): Done
- "Major-General Thomas David Pilcher, CB, (8 July 1858 – 14 December 1928) was a British Army officer, who commanded a mounted infantry unit in the Second Boer War and the 17th (Northern) Division during the First World War."
Academic and professional titles (such as "Doctor" or "Professor") should not be used before (or after) the name in the initial sentence or in other uses of the person's name. (WP:CREDENTIAL)
I think the rank "Major-General" should not be in the first sentence.
- While WP:CREDENTIAL may suggest this, I think it's probably out of synch with standard practice in the subject area. Most military FAs do this without any objection, and WP:CONTEXTLINK explicitly treats it as acceptable in the case of military ranks (but advises against linking) - "For example, a person's title or office, such as colonel, naturally appears ahead of their name, but the word "Colonel" should not have a link, since it doesn't establish context." Andrew Gray (talk) 19:13, 12 February 2014 (UTC)[reply]
- Check for Format of the first sentence (MOS:BOLDTITLE): Done
- Check for Proper names and titles: Done
- Check for Abbreviations and synonyms (MOS:BOLDSYN): None
- Check for Foreign language (MOS:FORLANG): None
- Check for Pronunciation: None
- Check for Contextual links (MOS:CONTEXTLINK): Done
- Check for Biographies: Done
- Check for Organisms: NA
- Check for Biographies of living persons: NA
- Check for Alternative names (MOS:LEADALT): Done
- Check for Non-English titles:
- Check for Usage in first sentence:
- Check for Separate section usage:
- Check for Length (WP:LEADLENGTH): Done
- The length of the lead should conform to readers' expectations of a short, but useful and complete, summary of the topic. A lead that is too short leaves the reader unsatisfied; a lead that is too long is difficult to read and may cause the reader to lose interest halfway.
- The lead is too long considering the article size and should be compressed.
- Check for Clutter (WP:LEADCLUTTER): None
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