The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Allen3 talk 12:06, 21 July 2016 (UTC)

Josi S. Kilpack

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Created by Amgisseman(BYU) (talk). Self-nominated at 21:04, 23 June 2016 (UTC).

Automatically reviewed by DYKReviewBot. This bot is experimental; please report any issues. This is not a substitute for a human review. --DYKReviewBot (report bugs) 23:41, 23 June 2016 (UTC)

  • - Amgisseman(BYU) - The article reads a little stilted, it mentions her first book being published, THEN that she had to publish the first five books herself? I think you can probably clarify that more. It also reads more like a magazine piece "spend time with her husband and kids" is not encylopedic to me. It is sourced, including the hook. QPQ seems to be done, but it needs a little clarification and more focus on Kilpack herself and her work instead of on her family life.  MPJ-DK  22:46, 30 June 2016 (UTC)
  •  MPJ-DK  Thanks for your review. I chose to remove the information about spending time with family. I agree that it does not sound encyclopedic. I also removed the sentence about publishing the first five books herself to avoid confusion. I could only find that information in the one article in BYU's Special Collections. The majority of information that I have found supports the other claims about her first book being published. While she still could have self-published other books, I haven't been able to find information that bridges that gap. Are there any other specific things you recommend changing in the article? Amgisseman(BYU) (talk) 20:10, 5 July 2016 (UTC)
  • I edited the article to restore the encyclopedic tone. The first hook is the best, but it's not verified by the article or the source, which says each title is a "food title". Yoninah (talk) 23:23, 16 July 2016 (UTC)
ALT 2:... that Josi S. Kilpack wrote a 12-book culinary mystery series, each book having a different "food title"?
  • Yoninah In order to be in line with the source, I have proposed ALT2.
  • All it needed were more sources, which I added. Calling on another reviewer to approve the original hook. Yoninah (talk) 21:36, 18 July 2016 (UTC)
  • I was going to approve this but wondered whether the word "dessert" was appropriate for a wedding cake. Why was ALT2 struck? Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:04, 20 July 2016 (UTC)
  • Because I found a source that confirmed these are all desserts. Cake = dessert. Yoninah (talk) 12:08, 20 July 2016 (UTC)
  • Well in that case, I will approve it. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:42, 20 July 2016 (UTC)