This is the talk page for discussing improvements to the Battle of Boulogne article. This is not a forum for general discussion of the article's subject.
The text of the entry was: Did you know ... that during the Battle of Boulogne on 23 May 1940, a shell from the British ship HMS Venomous(pictured) made a German tank turn "over and over, like a child doing a cart-wheel"?
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@Tomh903: Greetings, I'm not interested in Good article status but if it's what you want I'll help as much as I can, since I've written most of the article. PS I appreciate your recent additions. Regards Keith-264 (talk) 20:00, 21 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks very much, yes please do get involved as much as as you can whenever the review gets underway. I said I'd throw the article forward for a good article review because it already has a solid foundation provided by you and I've also recently acquired a few good sources on the battle so I don't imagine it will require drastic work to pass.Tomh903 (talk) 21:22, 21 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Apologies for the length of time I have taken to come back to this. Some comments:
Lead
through Dunkirk: suggest "from Dunkirk" Done
link XIX Corps Done
by when the Allied troops at Boulogne : suggest "by which time the Allied..." no, comma added
The second para mentions the Irish Guards and Welsh Guards. Perhaps establish precedence for them; e.g. "The Guards, including a battalion each of the Welsh and Irish Guards,..." or alternatively rephrase this portion to avoid mentioning specific fronts. Also the article for 20th Guards Brigade only has the Welsh Guards as part of the OOB, not the Irish (but could be a reflection on the lack of quality of that article). Done
before cutting off a party of the Irish: suggest "before a part of the Irish was cut off..." Done
RAF fighters: suggest linking fighters Done
around the Citadel above the lower town: lack of antecedence for the Citadel, maybe just refer to the French defenders around the old part of the town Done
which led to reproaches: from who? Done
Background
Liane river: caps on river? And again at the end of second para of Battle of France section. Done
When leave from the BEF began in December...: I'm not sure what you are saying here? Done
Link added to make it more clear the sentence is referring to Boulogne coming into use to transport British troops home for annual leave.
Somme river valley: caps on River and also move the link to the Somme River to this mention? Done
General Douglas Brownrigg: more precisely define his rank Done
Commandant Dutfoy de Mont de Benque: no links for rank or person? Done
Consider linking the anti-aircraft regiments, even if they are redlinks. It looks like there are several such articles so they be created in the future even if they don't exist at the moment. Done
the French had two 75 mm field guns, two 25 mm anti-tank guns: link field guns and anti-tank guns? (field guns actually linked much later in the article, in the battle section so move it to the first mention) Done
German XIX Corps, (General Heinz Guderian), reached: suggest "German XIX Corps, commanded by General Heinz Guderian,..." (also determine Guderian's precise rank at this time) Done
Link General Jean Pelissier de Féligonde, Hesdin, Admiral Leclerc Done
ordered You are to die at your posts one by one rather than give in: suggest "issued an order: "You are to die at your posts one by one rather than give in..." Done
Prelude
20th Guards Brigade (Brigadier William Fox-Pitt),: suggest "20th Guards Brigade, under the command of Brigadier William Fox-Pitt,". Similar wording for the 21st Infantry Division later on. Done
in the town awaiting evacuation, a mixture of recalled reservists and part-trained troops working as labourers.: suggest the second part of this sentence be moved to immediately follow the mention of the AMPC. At the moment it seems that these reservists/part-trained troops are in addition to the 1,500 of the AMPC which I don't think is your intention. Done
In the German offensive preparations, several commanders are mentioned. I suggest only identifying those important to the battle, probably Veiel, maybe Kirchner. It also needs to be clarified that their divisions are part of XIX Corps. Done
Battle
that the French had fallen back to Boulogne by German tanks: this makes it sound as they the French were being transported back by German tanks. Suggest "that the French had been forced back to Boulogne by German tanks" Done
which was of great help to the army: A little unclear which army. If there was a lot of rubble that could have helped the defenders. I don't think that is what you meant though so suggest "which was of great help to the attacking forces" Done
No antecedence for Frondeur or Orage Done I think ;O)
Apologies, I'm not sure what's meant by antecedence? As in the ships need a prefix similar to HMS for British ships?
No, neither ship had been mentioned until this point so it was a little "where did these ships come from?". But I see context has been provided for these now. I'm going to have another look over the article to make sure everything has been addressed but it is looking good so far. Zawed (talk) 07:16, 5 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The last sentence of the last para of the 23 May section is very long. Suggest breaking it up. Done
Lanquetot was based in the Haute Ville (Old Town, the Citadel),: a translation has already been provided earlier in the article for Haute Ville so the bracketed text is not required. Done
When Fox-Pitt received ordered to evacuate the orders excluded the French: some clarity issues here, suggest "When Fox-Pitt received orders to evacuate, these excluded the French" Done
link or translation for "entrepôt;"? Done
General Ewald von Kleist: precise rank for Kleist? Done
meant that the Aa Canal: no antecedence for the Aa Canal Done
Again, apologies, could you explain more the meaning of antecedence for the canal? Done
@Zawed: I think that's most of the recommendations, except for the antecedence which need further explanation, addressed by myself and Keith-264 if you want to take another look at it. Tomh903 (talk) 12:53, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@Everyone, I like the work that's been done and will try to read it through today but I'm hampered by a most unwelcome return of pain from a trapped nerve in my neck. What a way to spend a weekend! ;O) Regards Keith-264 (talk) 13:35, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The British destroyer HMS Venomous which fought German tanks during the Battle of Boulogne.
... that during the Battle of Boulogne on 23 May 1940, a shell from the British ship HMS Venomous made a German tank turn "over and over, like a child doing a cart-wheel"? Source: Hawkins, I. (2003). Destroyer: An Anthology of First-Hand Accounts of the War at Sea 1939–1945.
ALT1:... that during the Battle of Boulogne, a shell from a British ship made a German tank turn "over and over, like a child doing a cart-wheel"? Source: Hawkins, I. (2003). Destroyer: An Anthology of First-Hand Accounts of the War at Sea 1939–1945.
Hi Tomh903, review follows: article promoted to GA on 8 May; article is well written and cited inline throughout; main sources are all offline, AGF on no copyright violation from these; hook is interesting and mentioned in the article, it could perhaps be rephrased to say that "a shell from the British ship" to make it clear what caused the tank to overturn, but I will leave to the promoter to decide; AGF on hook sourcing which is offline; image is appropriate, though the caption could do with trimming, if used; image is appropriately licensed; user is exempt from QPQ requirement as they have no previous DYK nominations - Dumelow (talk) 11:09, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@Dumelow: Agreed, have added "a shell from the British ship". Also agreed on trimming caption, perhaps simply "HMS Venomous which fought German tanks during the Battle of Boulogne" is appropriate?.
Hi Tomh903, I think it could even be reduced to just "HMS Venomous", but we can leave the decision to whoever arranges the hooks. Just a thought, we could add "on 23 May 1940" to the hooks and request this appear on the main page on the anniversary? - Dumelow (talk) 15:27, 8 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]